Monday, September 9, 2019
Permission to be yourself
Kids are told a lot of stuff growing up. Some stuff is good. Some stuff is crap. To a kid it pretty much all looks the same. Most of the people telling kids crap don’t know they are telling them crap. Intentions are good, but conditions change. Just because a person is older doesn’t mean they are wiser, sadly.
Then there are people who are trying to influence kids for their own benefit. I’m looking at you military recruiters. They might be some of the worse, but are far from the only ones. There are coaches more focused on their careers than the kids playing for them. Parents can be worse,. They could be trying to experience their younger years though their kids. Other people want their kids to follow in their footsteps. How many kids end up in the family business for the simple reason that’s what’s expected? Far too many is my guess.
It’s not just kids that live their lives following someone else’s script. Adults do it all the time too. It’s easy to get stuck in a rut. Some people go to their graves never being anyone but who they were expected to be. Other people reach a point in their lives where they realize they aren’t living authentically. The triggering event can be the death of their parents. All of a sudden there are these middle aged people who realize they’ve been living for their parents their whole life and now they don’t have to. I bet you can think of a few people who made major life changes later in life.
Being stuck in the role that parents or society required you to play happened a lot in the old days. Serfs, for example, didn’t have a lot of opportunity to do much else. These days there are a lot more options, yet most people will end up doing what the people around them expect. Even the “rebels” will rebel in a certain established way.
Right now I’m seeing a lot of changes happening in society. Fundamental things are different. The danger is that while many things have changed where it matters, the surface appearances haven’t changed as much. it’s happening with changes in the legal system, politics, economics, religion, medical care, and who knows what else.
Don’t sleepwalk your way though the changes. Many of you see what’s going on, but still act as if the old rules apply. You’ve got to give yourself permission to break out of the box.