Sunday, December 5, 2010

In Disguise

I've got a disguise. It's to make me look like something I'm not. In my closet, is a suit and tie. Generally, I only wear it when in front of a judge.

When you go to a strange land with foreign customs, it good to try and blend in a little. Your high school French will never fool the Québécois, but at least you are taking a stab at it. I know I don't quite look like a normal citizen, but in a courtroom, dressing up is one of those customs flaunted at your own peril. At least I'm trying.

Today I was in disguise once more. The transmission shop is having a heck of a time finding a key part to my transmission. Rather than keep me waiting, they offered to reimburse me for car rental. Of course, that assumes that I'm capable of renting a car.

I carry a lot of odds and ends on me for emergencies. I've a metal match fire starter on my key chain, along with a can opener and a bottle opener. Always carry a multi-tool. I've a small solar charged flashlight. In NH, I carry a concealed 380 handgun. For the rental car emergency, I carry a pristine credit card with no debt on it. In the strange wilderness known as a city, it's as important a survival tool as anything else I carry.

99.99% of the time I don't give a crap about credit cards, credit ratings, or the state of my driver's license. For the way I live most of the time, it just doesn't matter. When it does matter, like at the car rental place, I'm pretending to be someone I'm not: a solid citizen. Today I found out I can still pull it off. For a bit there, I wasn't even sure if that credit card was any good. It wouldn't be the first long expired piece of plastic in my wallet. At least they are good for slipping locked doors -a more likely use for my plastic than renting a car.

Most people still live in that world I only visit. My grasp of the customs is a bit rusty, but today I found out I could pass one more time.



  1. A suit!! What is a suit?? OH wait, it must be that dark dusty thing hanging way in the back of my closet hidden by long grown out of pants. Yep, keeping the old small pants just in case I get back to my boy-hood figure. . . Keeping a suit, I have no clue why.

  2. I had to buy one when my daughter when through a very ugly divorce. For the kids, I'll wear a suit. Emergency use only.